THE ROMAN ALPHABET

I’ve long had

the urge

to write at least one poem

using the roman alphabet

one of my friends thinks

that if we switch to the roman alphabet

our people will steal less

and immediately

our messy byzantinisms

our obnoxious sovietisms our endless ugro-finnicisms

(sorry ugrics, sorry finns)

will disappear and something will snap in our heads

—and “voila!” we are part of europe

and another of my friends feels

that if we switch to the roman alphabet

we will automatically be better understood

by western slavs

all kinds of poles and czechs

(and even germans will suddenly respect us)

and even if they don’t actually understand us any better

at least it might appear

that they could understand us better

and another of my friends feels

that we should start switching to the roman alphabet

gradually starting from Western Ukraine

where the ground, that is the soil, that is the people

are better prepared for this

since they travel to italy and portugal to work

and know europe not only second hand

but from their own experiences

doing the hardest work, filled with deepest envy, facing sheer ingratitude

and Mykola Riabchuk [1] who writes essays on politics

for whom I have the greatest respect

(notice I did not capitalize italy or portugal, but I capitalize his name)

feels that in order for ukraine to survive between east and west

it must shrink to digestible dimensions

that is to the 6 regions west of the river zbruch

I argued with him for a long time

trying to justify why vinnytsky, zhytomyrsky

and my own native khmelnytsky regions should be added to the list

but you know how smart Mykola Riabchuk is

once he thinks of something, that’s that

only bukovyna [6] will find this convenient

it will automatically switch to the roman alphabet

when it becomes a part of greater romania

or even if it only joins little moldova

it will be forced to switch to the roman alphabet

if every living ukrainian poet

writes one poem in the roman alphabet

it will be possible to make an anthology

of contemporary ukrainian poetry written in the roman alphabet

what a pity that Ivan Malkovych won’t be able to write a poem

about the crescent moon of the letter —

and the slender candle of the letter —

Notes

[1] Mykola Riabchuk (b. 1953) is a Ukrainian public intellectual, journalist and literary critic. He was active in unofficial Ukrainian culture during the Soviet years and an instrumental figure in the development of post-Soviet Ukrainian culture.

[2] For more on Bukovyna, see Note 1.

Translated by Virlana Tkacz and Wanda Phipps